Call the president all the names you want.
But he was right. Bitter, under-educated, formerly-middle class, heterosexual, Christian white people see their place at the top of the American social heap disappearing. And they cling to their religion and guns. They see their jobs being “taken” by “illegal immigrants” even though not a single one of them has worked in a field picking tobacco or apples. They lash out at “educated” people and effect an obnoxious tone when saying words like “academia.”
They use words with definitions they don’t know like “Keynesian” and “Marxist” and “socialist” and shout them out really loud. Because it’s not socially acceptable to yell “darkie” and “faggot” and “kike.”
They make asses of themselves as they scream things like “get your government hands off my medicare” or weep as they let out telling phrases like “I want my country back” when what they mean is “when I was 21, black men carried my bags off the train and now there’s one in the White House.”
They remember with pride when the teacher told them they could grow up to be president. But now that they see they can’t… and never could… they decide to support obviously un-qualified people so long as they fit a few criteria: They have to look like someone they’d see at the Mega Mall or the PTA meeting and be no smarter than themselves.
Their candidates of choice have to be able to be so shameless as to proudly state on TV that they have no idea what they’re talking about and – just like they did when they were popular cheerleaders in high school – give a wink to the class to let them know “I’m totally faking this and I’m gettin’ away with it.”
They also have to come up with absurd reasons that they’re “better” than someone else. 20 years ago… being white, middle class and Christian made you special. It made you lucky and the leaders of the “free” world. Now it makes you ordinary. So they enact laws to make sure their place isn’t eroded any more. They do things like make laws to make sure they can tell people “how” to live. They might have to say “yes sir” to a black boss and “yes ma’am” to an Asian judge but there’s no way they’re going to allow the two men who live together down the street to be equal to them.
They say things like “if we let gay people marry, it will diminish the fine institution of marriage.”
But we all know what it REALLY means which is “it will make me even more ordinary than I am now.”
And THAT is why the tea party exists.
And frankly, I’m sick and fucking tired of them.
